我也很想他

那時我們總有好多話　什麼事都可以講
我的愛情比你早　卻一直放在心上
後來你們之間的變化　我不想再多說話
經過了相遇和掙扎
我還是無法將他放下

那是多久後的事了　有一天你突然問我
在那個時候　是否也愛著他

我也很想他　我們都一樣
在他的身上　曾找到翅膀
只是那時的他　是因為你他開始飛翔

我也很想他　在某個地方
我少了尷尬　你少了肩膀
而夏天還是那麼短　思念卻很長



還記得　那年我們曾許下的願望
星星騙了我們　我們卻因此上了一課
成長必修的學分



我們都一樣

Since i threw my sadness away....only yesterday.

ONLY YESTERDAY





After long enough of being alone

Everyone must face their share of loneliness

In my own time nobody knew

The pain I was goin' through

And waitin' was all my heart could do



Hope was all I had until you came

Maybe you can't see how much you mean to me

You were the dawn breaking the night

The promise of morning light

Filing the world surrounding me

When I hold you



(*) Baby, Baby

Feels like maybe things will be all right

Baby, Baby

Your love's made me

Free as a song singin' forever



(**) Only yesterday when I was sad

And I was lonely

You showed me the way to leave

The past and all its tears behind me

Tomorrow may be even brighter than today

Since I threw my sadness away

Only Yesterday



I have found my home here in your arms

Nowhere else on earth I'd really rather be

Life waits for us

Share it with me

The best is about to be

So much is left for us to see

When I hold you



***** It's for you, cos you're family. Pls come back soon......

Goodbye my past, hello my present.

It's late and i have to wake up early tommorrow for work.

Just feel like saying something.

Hi this is Michel.
Drummer. Music lover. Aspired music lover, who is finding it hard to lift up his puny pen to write anythin lately. Who is not playin any right beat on his drums lately.


Think that was the blow that i need. But it's fine actually. People are comin and leavin like it's a club or mall. Feel so deeply unappreciated. But of cos there's a few who were there and stickin to it like a tattoo on their bodies....sometimes i just wonder why do i even bother....which in this case, at this moment, i have decided......i will just have to move on with the rest.

Been reading abt Keith Green. Thanks to Tim who bought me this book about Keith Green. Was so inspired by what i read...the way he and his wife operates...its just so amazing.
I begin to reflect on my life. Wow if only i could be like him. haha....His wife is like the ideal sidekick. Just can't help but to think that it will be wonderful to have somone who plays music passionately with me for the rest of my life. Someone who plays the guitar, or piano...someone who can love God together with me....who can write songs with me.....my thoughts jus go on and on.......yupp that person is so near. I know her face. God....it's amazing.

and so.....He leads me right to Yamaha in the most unnoticeable corner of tampines mall. Yamaha sell many beautiful acoustic guitars. Really lovely ones. Did God lead me here. I was so filled with Him as i walk into the shop, my ipod is playin Don Moen...I begin to ask if this is what He wants me to do.....

Shared this with Polly. I suggested we can ling xiu together once a week, and perhaps practice guitar together once a week too..she was so supportive and totally excited about this. Man...i was so encouraged! I still don't know if this amounts to anythin at all in the future, but for now this is it. U have to believe it to make it happen. But to see Polly's beautiful eyes gleaming with those smiles, what can be wrong about this? :)

For a whole afternoon of reflection....to knowing my existing demons from the past, to God's reassuring breeze, to Polly's readilly nods and smiles....i know there are things i have to do. First is to exorcist any remaining past demons that is holdin me back. Have to ask for forgiveness too, if i offended ppl in the past. Have to talk to my sheperd. Have to account for Polly, for it's my job as a man. For i wanted to take care of her. So i have to do this. I have to look forward, not peek backwards every now and then. Goodbye my past, hello my present.

Thanks Polly. I have find in you all the comfort and inspiration and love. You are always so sweet and understanding. And u never look into my past and judge me. And always encouragin me to move forward....

Thanks........to God who is almighty and was always patting on my back and said: "get up and go!" When times are bad, when people judge, it's always You who stretch out your hand for me. Thanks for being my best friend. :)

People=Plural but God=Singular

Think people is lightning quick to judge. Yes, live with it. Close friends have a higher tendency sometimes. I think it sure feels good to have the power to judge people......but then again, we are not God.

. Is it really shocking to see what you saw? Perhaps it's becos you haven't know me lately, the things that happened in my life. If u do, i am sure, you can tell things are actually quite good, not shocking. :) There's reason why things happened. I could have guess your reaction....and perhaps to some levels i am not comfortable abt it. But then again it's your feelings, not mine. Who am i to say how u should feel? I think its a probable natural reaction that you are shocked, haha...yes i am sure i know what i am doin. Cos I am at peace with it. At least i would like to say this.....i am not in a 暧昧 stage anymore. Things are clear, thoughts are clear, theres no communication blockage. No heated arguements, only understanding nods and truckload of words spoken from the heart. Why can't people learn how to communicate well, instead of guessings and assuming? Erm, i think we can speak cos we are given a mouth, so use it to communicate. The mouth is not meant to be a weapon by the way....


Sorry to tell u i should leave. Sorry to tell u i am no good for you. Sorry to tell u that you are not ready. Sorry for those tears. @ that point i feel that i am no good. But deep down, I was hoping u will ask me to stay. It's an emotional weekend for you. But I am glad to be there. Yes not to mentioned the buzzings of the unwanted attentions. It's sure irritating to some point. Like it's an eternal road to peacefulville. Yes there should always be a God in our lives. God love u and me. Us. Instead of us holding hands, why dun we let God hold ours' ? :)

People, people, people, people........the messy lot.

That's why people are plural and God is and will forever be, singular..........for He is the one thing we ever need.

to be continue

i am lookin for a peaceful corner in my life, and i think i found more than that.

i look high and i look low...and i caught a glimpse of those eyes that glitters.

i have travelled a long and winding path, not knowing what tomorrow brings, but i think i have found hope.

i reckon i have found the missing piece of the puzzle.

wait til i see what the whole puzzle reveal......

............(to be continue.)

Show me The Way

Hi.

Need to blog about this. Relationship stuff.

Truly it's easy to get into a relationship not really understanding the significance and importance of being with another person. Some people take a whole lifetime to understand the true meaning of getting together. I hope i am not that person. I feel that its really really inportant to graps the true concept of getting together with someone, true concept being God's standards.

Many factors have to be considered. Trust, faith, commitment...understanding the other party's needs and to truly love one another in godly ways. Being there for the other person in the most undesirable times. Like-mindness.

I ponder and ponder. How many lessons to go to get prepared and equipped? Have i truly know how to lead and take care of that person? I guess i am not truly prepared yet. I need God's guidance and love, patience and endurance. Perserverance. It's scary sometimes. The situations i got myself into......when will it be the right time?

Sometimes things can be so grey.

Hopefully God shows the way. I need to depend on him for the courage to face whats to come. It's not going to be easy. It just not easy when u are lost in the crowd. Situations. I am beginning to think I might never be ready. But at least I know i must trust God for this, and do the right thing, make the right choice.

To the person who reads this. It's not easy. Never easy. This whirlwind ride. I hope to be silent for now, to let God speaks to me. To let God show me the way. I feel so squashed up. So drained and unworthy. So sinful and.......bad. I need God.

But, I also want to give thanks for the many wonderful things that happened as well. Truly in the midst of getting lost, God has been merciful and has been providing for me. I am continuing to give thanks, and truly learnt how to give thanks in good and bad times. I want to be a man who can lead his family one day, to be able to lead his wife. To be able to provide and to love deeply. To be able to give til the day when we see Him again.

This is a different experinece, and i am a different person. May God continue to show the way, to path the way.

I pray hard.

See you guys.

Its been awhile since i last blog.

This mission trip gives me good reasons to blog at this point of time. It's my first time goin for mission. alot of anticipations and of cos, worries too. Adapting to a new surrounding. China is really far. I havent been there before. alot of uncertainties. Have to admit there are fears in me. Its jus me. for the pass five years werkin for Geoff, i have develope fears of goin overseas. I dun enjoy flyin. Even if its holiday, i dreaded flyin. i enjoy coach better.But I do believe in God's plan, and i believe i will be in good hands, even if problems were to arise. So God, i have been depending on you all these while, and this time time, for i am called to give, to spread your words to all nations, and declare your glory. i am in good hands.

People. I find sadness and joy in them. Gonna leave soon. the people in my life. Glad to have some of the closest ppl in my life in the team. Which is good. Thank God for them in the trip. It will be a blast! haha....

My Falter None buddies who didnt happen to be in this trip. keep the fire burning, will ya. I am gonna miss u guys, yes its just a short trip, sorry for being a tad bit too paranoid. It's just me. And peace be with me at long last. Xiaojia, thanks for reconcilling wif me prior to this trip. I need the peace to go for this trip. And thanks for being a friend. May God bless you the way He blessed me. Bihua, thanks for being a sister to me. SMU project rocks. It's a project worthwhile doin, in reference to our dear fren, xiaolu. Do keep her in prayers. Hopefully we will see her in our midst one day.

I truly enjoy the walkin we did the other night. Never walk that much in my recent memory. And wonderful sharing. Tirng but great. But i would love to walk a 'longer mile'....that breeze from the sea is from God. So refreshing. You can smell peace and calmness in the wind. u can find solace in those breeze, comin from the sea. I found solace in you. You melt those fears away. You set my mind at ease. Let's have another pocky stick.............:)

Alright.
I shall sleep now.

Take care, girls and boys.

3:35AM sunday morning, Jun 4th 2006